Don’t Fall into the "Hierarchy of Pain" Trap!

There is a phenomenon in helping professions that I began referring to as the “hierarchy of pain.” This psychological coping mechanism involves measuring our own pain and suffering in relation to our clients, students, patients, or community members. It's different from the medical definition of pain levels. We often deem ourselves to have it better than others and therefore believe we have no right to complain.

It’s a form of self-neglect that is common among helping and protecting professionals.

The "hierarchy of pain" can be deceptive because this inner voice dismisses our own pain as insignificant and not worthy of tending to our needs (hence our habit of skipping self-care). It is the same voice that belittles the pain of others who may be experiencing "minor" suffering. This voice may also criticize those deemed to have more strength, more privilege or less perceived pain as being too sensitive or reacting excessively to their problems. This same voice may also lead us to withhold or delay service towards people who are reserved with their expression of pain. Practicing self-compassion can help us let go of the urge to judge others and fall into bias - instead meeting each person where they are.

*Full article originally published by Taryn Hughes on March 8th, 2018 coining the term and concept "hierarchy of pain” within the helping and protecting professions.

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